But that is not the whole answer.
I have bit by bit been enmeshing myself into the TSC Community. (TSC being the website that Janardan runs, for Sonic fans to compete against each other). It started by me making good friends with MK. We started talking a lot, and now we are really close friends. He understands a lot of what me and Janardan are going through, because he faces similar, if different, challenges. But his schedule is unpredictable, and so when I was getting used to looking to talk to him, I started looking in TSC, because then I would be there when he came round.
And so I started talking with people, and I decided that it'd be fun to send some people care packages, so I started a topic about that on the forum. And some people started talking about cooking as a result of that, so I've started a mini-blog on the forum about that, so this group of guys can learn to cook. And then...somehow I got involved in Mafia.
I love Mafia the party game. Always had, so ever since people in TSC started talking about it, I had wanted to try, but registration and such at things like that can be a hassle, so I had never watned to do it right then. A few days ago, though, I wasn't really doing much else, so I thought it would be a fun diversion. And what it has really done is made me feel like a part of a community again. I feel so often like such an individual, so introverted, because I enjoy doing lots of things by myself. But I love people, and I love being part of a group. I remember first experiencing it freshman year of college. Here we are, all coming from this community, this tight-knit bunch of people.
And so, this is tribute to the new friends that I have discovered.
SkyL - who has an unwitting love of Tikal, an eternal hate for Shade, and who is so intriguing to me
PPA - a German who loves to play
genus - someone intelligent who respects my intelligence - I value that respect a lot
mike89 - who is so fun to be co-conspirators with
SonicAD - who bemoans me every time I ask him to play, because he is as addicted as I am, and so cannot say no
Stefan - who is obsessed with the fact that I am always Mafia, even though I am not!
The_T - who has a very bad temper, but I like him anyway
Upth - who I am always convinced does not live in America because of the hours he keeps, and who plays Carcasonne with me when everyone else has gone to bed
Bertin/Achlys/Alondite - they all kind of blend together to me, because they never really talk
Paraxade - who seems to have just as much free time as I do, as he is always up for a game
Spinballwizard - who plays, but seems to like playing with non-TSC people better
ShadowJacky - who refuses to play, because he cannot play in Firefox 3, and who chides me all the time about being addicted to Mafia
OSG - I'll throw him in here, even though he has nothing to do with mafia, because he just talks to me
RPG - who seems to care so much about people showing caring about him that I can't help but care for him
CosmicFalcon - who we always joke is going to steal me away from Rolken
And I'm sure I've missed a few, like Quartz and Sondow, who I care about, but don't know what to say. But here they are, and they all matter to me.
So when I say, I've been playing Mafia all week, I hope you can see that I've been doing so much more.

3 comments:
Mafia, eh? I didn't think it would transfer over well to the internet. But that sounds like fun!
I do think the internet is a valuable way to connect with people. I'm not very good at it but I try sometimes. But just because I'm struggling with deepening relationships that can only exist online doesn't mean it doesn't work and it's not worth doing.
I'm glad you've found some support and a community of fun people. I hope that they appreciate the friend they have in you.
Well it's a bit different on the internet. There a whole lot of other roles. Janardan complains that it is just like internet poker, but I don't think that's quite fair. You should come play sometime!
Nice, I got a mention there.
Glad to see that a silly internet game has restored a sense of community.
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